Fall Out Boy - Take This to Your Grave
Released May 6th, 2003
Patrick Stump, Pete Wentz, Joe Trohman, Andy Hurley
Genre: Bitch punk (Pop punk / emo)
Intro
If you are a Fall Out Boy fan, please click off this review. I am going to SHIT all over Fall Out Boy because I think they are the bitchiest punk band, the most absolute overrated, sell out shit ass cock stupid band. I hate them, I hate their music, I have high respect for the band members because it takes a lot of courage and drive to push yourself and be a musician, so all the props to you and high respect but holy FUCK could you make music that actually can go in my ear drums without me wanting to fucking cut myself?? Jesus fuck. Anyway yeah I have NEVER listened to a Fall Out Boy album before- I even decided to not go to a Green Day concert because Fall Out Boy was opening for them. I have a strong hatred for this band for no reason other than I think their music is shit, so let's go stomp on some shit ass band.
Before this review actually starts I just want to get this out of the way. I touched briefly on this during the intro but I want to make it highly present here. I have absolutely NOTHING against band members Peter, Pete, Joe, and Andy. I think they're very brave to go out there and play music- something my anxiety would definitely be against. I have nothing against them, and I want no hate to be directed towards the members as people. I have absolutely nothing against them- but I am going to shit on the band and the music as a whole. Please note this review is for entertainment purposes, none of my words should be taken at face value because I'm half joking most of the time I write these reviews, and I just want everyone to know I don't condone hate towards people, I want peace and love and all that, and I don't want anyone to hate on these people. The BAND however, I feel like we can be justified to hate. Let's get into my thoughts here.
Thoughts & Feelings?
This song makes me feel like I just dyed my hair black and parted it off to the side to cover one eye, and I wear all this crazy makeup and get spikey boots and a black leather jacket and roll up to school and nobody talks to me because I look fucking weird and then I get home and cry because "nobody understands me". Anyway don't ask me to elaborate further.
The instruments are fine, it's just the vocals I hate them.
Smash or Pass?
Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things to Do Today - Pass. Holy FUCK I haven't even started LISTENING TO THE ALBUM YET. I'm just passing this because holy FUCK imagine trying to tell someone this is your favourite song. Holy fuck what a long ass song, all of these song names are long ass fucking songs. STOP. Holy fuck I can understand it if you're doing it as a gimmick once in a while but half these FUCKING SONGS ARE LONG AS FUCK. Jesus CHRIST. Okay into the actual song ugh. Okay the guitar is pretty decent but holy FUCK do the vocals sound so god damn processed. I hate it. I already knew that the issue with this band is the bitchy ass whining vocals that stain our punk rock reputation. I hate this. The song isn't BAD, but holy fuck I just wish the singer didn't sound like he was trying too fucking hard. I'm just nitpicking though. This song isn't bad. The guitar is pretty good, but on name alone I wouldn't want to listen to this again.
Dead on Arrival - Pass. It's THAT right there. These fucking VOCALS. They're just so whiny and bitchy. I was REALLY scared because the last song wasn't bad- but holy fuck I can't stand the vocals in this song. I hate bands that sing like this. I can't exactly describe it but it's just so whiny and try hard. Like try LESS. Every time the vocalist sings "Dead on Arrival", I just get pissed off. Like yeah the other instruments are fine and do their job but holy fuck stop WHINING.
Grand Theft Autumn / Where Is Your Boy - Pass. I want to throw up. It's a shame cause the guitar is actually kind of cool but the vocals make me want to throw up. This has the most plays on Spotify and this is the song I like the least so far. Have you ever seen those Tick Tocks or whatever of the guy with his shirt off lifting weights and posing for the camera to try and impress all the girls? That's exactly what I would describe this band as. One of those losers that look like they pull 0 girls (no comment), but they just try way too fucking hard to look badass but they just end up looking like idiots and getting laughed at and put in cringe compilations. Oh my god that's exactly how I would describe this band. Cringe.
Saturday - Pass. Another stinker. It's really a shame and a tragedy because the other instruments are decent, it's just the vocals are terrible, bitchy, and whiny. This song has me rolling my eyes. This song infuriates me. There is some screaming, that's kind of cool. It is SO completely ruined by the vocals though. Absolutely terrible.
Homesick at Space Camp - Pass. I'm quickly losing my patience. It's a good thing I'm writing this on Wednesday, cause if I was listening to this on Friday it would have ruined my day to listen to this album. This song isn't the worst offender on this album though so I have to at least give it credit for not being absolutely terrible.
Sending Postcards from a Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here) - Pass. I had to pick this review back up the next day cause I can only handle so much. I'm sorry but I never want to listen to this crap just because it's so vocal oriented, and the vocals are so whiny.
Chicago Is So Two Years Ago - Pass. Same old shit. This song is just so fucking basic. I just really hate bands / music that focuses 90% on the vocalist. I need a little guitar solo once in a while here like where is that shit? Nowhere to be seen. Where are the cool riffs and shit? Nowhere to be seen. Where are the 80 vocal nuances thrown around everywhere? OH they're the substance of every single song.
The Pros and Cons of Breathing -Pass, what a stupid fucking name of a song. Ew I can't believe I'm saying this but I hate the vocals of this song. Just kidding, of course I can believe it. It's the same old shit over and over and over and over and over again. Show some fucking life, boys. Do something different other than your stupid ass "WoOOaAaAaaUUhhAaAwOoOOoaAAaaAAAHHH oOoHhhHHh", SHUT THE FUCK UP. They even sing over a guitar solo here, that's a fucking disgrace. How can someone do that?
Grenade Jumper - Pass. Every single song is the same. Cool guitar riff to get me excited and then the same old whiny singing starts. This entire albums feels like a meme that the vocalist didn't get enough attention as a kid and needed to sing over literally everything and make it more important than all the other instruments. It sounds like the Backstreet Boys started a punk band.
Calm Before the Storm - PASS. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP THIS IS THE WORST OFFENDER ON THE LIST. 5 years have been taken off of my life because of this song alone. At least there's a little bit of screaming.
Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over - Pass. These songs always get me so hyped up because at the beginning they sound great but then all of a sudden the singing starts and I'm like blagh. Same result here.
The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes - Pass. Let me move on with my day. Fuck this band, sorry not my thing. This song fucking sucks.
Conclusion
If you want me to be completely honest, the band isn't BAD in THIS album. It's just NOT my taste. I think they're terrible just because I can't stand their vocals. They are so annoying and just get on my nerves that it's extremely difficult for me to enjoy this. I can imagine that singing these songs would be fucking annoying to do. Anyway yeah at least the band is trying in this album, just shut UP. That's all I really ask for.
RANK: D
What do you guys think? Am I biased because I absolutely adore the vocals from shit bands like Megadeth and every punk band on earth? Let me know in the comments below. Happy Friday everyone, love y'all.
- Sharky
No video here. Just search them on YouTube if you want to listen, I won't subject you to the torture here.
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